what is supervised visitation? how can i make their dad agree?

My kids’ dad is wealthy but I only have a small pay to raise my kids with a little alimony (he says he rather throw his $$ into the drain than give me a cent more, I go for peace than $$). But he always bring them to shop for branded stuff and expensive restaurant, they always come back with latest gadgets and toys. it may be out of love or to show the kids it is better to be with him. But what abt the thrifty lifestyle we lead on wkdays and my nagging that hardwork and thrift are the values we shd have? They start to tell me “its not ur money, why u bother” and call me “stingy mummy”. I can let their dad visit them for all the benefits of “having a father”, but is it doing them good or harm? AND my kids are worried 1 day when their dad remarry, they will meet his new wife and kids and they will be devastated. SO, what can I do with supervised visitation? He hates the sight of me and openly display it in full sight of my kids, I can’t go near him..

Interesting scenario. Here is what I would do.

1: Keep a written log of every item he purchases for the children. Track the cost. If you don’t know the actual cost, then look it up. Note the date, etc. Keep meticulous records.

Should he one day alienate the children for a ‘new’ family, then sit down with an attorney, on behalf of the children, and present the log and ask if there is anything he/she can do to protect the children from loosing the lifestyle their father has made them accustomed to. After all, their father willingly provided this lifestyle for them even after the divorce he should be held accountable.

2: If the items are used at your home, set ground rules for their use. If the children don’t want to go by the rules, then the items go back to their fathers house and they can use them there.

Above all else, like my daughter says “kill them with kindness” meaning be gracious in your interactions with your ex. Talk kindly about him in front of the children. If you don’t have anything nice to say, then it’s best not to say anything. Children don’t like to choose between their parents and they really shouldn’t have to, under most circumstances.

3: Share financial tracking with your children. You will teach them how to manage money and give them a realistic view of what it takes to keep a household together. Food, Gas, Electricity, Water, Clothing are expensive. They will be better off knowing how to manage money, then being surprised with it when they have to provide for themselves.

Be the better parent, be gracious in front of the children, and as they grow older, they will come to understand the dynamics.

Value Village Thrift Store

You Have to Kiss a Lot of Frogs $1.34 Tales from the dating pond. “It only takes one.” “There are a lot of other fish in the sea.” “Every pot has a cover.” “When it’s your time, it will just happen.” Ugh! Karrie Kline had heard it all. But her search for the perfect man had never been all that pressing until her laugh lines became more noticeable, she attended one too many bridal showers and woke up next to far too many never-gonna-co…

TY Beanie Baby – WHISPER the Deer $0.01 She’s very shy as you can see When she hides behind a tree With big brown eyes and soft to touch This little fawn will love you so much! Whisper is very en-”deer”-ing. She was born April 5, 1997. There is something ethereal and gentle about a fawn, and this spotted baby will take your breath away. She is lying down as though she’s not quite sure how her new legs work. Her innocent face has blac…

Clue $16.99 Who’ Where’ Which weapon’ For generations, around the world, Mr. Boddy has met his end at the hand of one of six infamous suspects in this family game. As you search the mansion’s nine rooms and secret passages, be on the lookout for those murderous suspects. And watch out for those deadly weapons. The mystery changes every time you play. If you can collect the right clues and make the right deduc…

Connect 4 x 4 $11.76 Connect 4 x 4 is similar to the classic original, but now you can play with up to four people, and the double-sided grid adds greater complexity and more chances to win. Designed for ages eight and up, Connect 4 x 4 may have doubled the challenge, the amount of players, and the grid–but the fun and scoring are still the same: four in a row and you win! Connect 4 x 4 Ages: 8+ Required: 4 p…

Nintendo 64 System – Video Game Console $200.00 Nintendo first dabbled in video games during the industry’s early years of the mid-’70s. Generations of successful gaming console releases through the years led to the much-hyped 1996 launch of Nintendo 64, a system that represented a giant evolutionary leap in video game technology. Within the first three days of launch, hundreds of thousands of gamers hunkered down with Mario 64, considered by m…